Sunday, July 30, 2006
Haloscan commenting and trackback have been added to this blog.
Saturday, July 29, 2006
5 Signs the Vols Are Making Me Prematurely Old, Part 1
“The white line’s getting longer, and the saddle’s getting cold,
and I’m much too young to feel this damn old”
-Garth Brooks (before he started to really suck)
I don’t want to spend too much time rehashing the debacle that was last season, but it is undeniable that the 2005 Vol football season left me worse for wear. The ravages of last season combined with the uncertainty of the coming season have led me to identify at least 5 factors associated with Tennessee football that are causing me to show signs of early aging. So today I begin to share with you some of my ailments and he culprits behind them, along with what I think it will take to cure me.
#5: The Symptom: Hair loss
The Cause: Losing to Vanderbilt
I’ll admit it, I was way too cocky when it came to Vandy. My list of “Stuff That Will Happen Before Vanderbilt Beats Tennessee” included the Cubs winning the World Series and Hillary winning the Republican Presidential nomination. And why wouldn’t a Vol fan be cocky going into last year‘s match up? UT gets more people to show up for the Vol Walk than Vandy gets for a home game. Tennessee has separate athletic departments for men’s and women’s sports, Vandy doesn’t even have separate departments for intramural and varsity sports. None of the players for either team were born the last time VU beat UT. Naturally, cokiness came with the territory, at least until November 19, 2005.
Remember the “Behind every ‘Dore is a Tennessee score” t-shirts? Well last November, behind every ’Dore there wasn’t even a Tennesee first down. The Vols’ inability to move the chains late in the 4th quarter provided a permanent answer to the question “Were the ‘05 Vols really that bad?”
The Cure: Return to normalcy
The little bit of hair I hadn’t pulled out earlier in the season was in grave danger during that 4th quarter. Another loss to Vandy and I’ll look like Tony Kornheiser, fat, orange, and bald. To save the few sprouts left on my gourd, I need to see the Vols handle VU like they did for the last 20-whatever years and get out of the bottom half of the division.
Next time: Headache, chest pain, and Steve Spurrier.
Thursday, July 27, 2006
Why a blog?
Recently, as I felt the building excitement of a new college football season just around the corner, I began searching the internet for new sources of information. Although I had heard of blogs, I didn’t know much about them until a few weeks ago. The more I learned, the more I realized that a blog is just what I need.
You see, last season I saw my beloved Tennessee Vols do one thing they had only done twice before in my lifetime, and one thing they had only done once before in my lifetime: they had a losing season, and they lost to Vanderbilt. Personally, I believe that losing to Vandy is the lowest point that can be reached by any UT team. And I mean any team. If UT plays Vandy in tiddlywinks, the Vols should win 100-0, or by whatever margin you can run up in tiddlywinks.
But the unthinkable did happen, and now I am left with a tiny, cold morsel of fear in the pit of my stomach, a morsel that says this year won’t be any better, that Erik Ainge will play more like he did in Baton Rouge last year than he did in Athens in 2004, that we’ll hear CPF say “we’re gonna work like heck to get better” 5 minutes after getting embarrassed by the Evil Genius for the umpteenth time, and then getting drubbed the next week by LSU.
And so it has dawned on me that I need therapy, and that is what this blog is. It is not deep statistical analysis, it is not insider information, it is not play-by-play breakdown of each week’s game. It is opinion about the current state of the Tennessee program. It is random thoughts about the various teams that make up the SEC. It is one man’s view on the most exciting sport played in the shortest season every year.
It is therapy for a fan who sees his team at a crossroads and has no idea where it’s going.
Welcome to my therapy session blog. I hope you enjoy, and feel free to join the conversation.
GO VOLS!